June 12, 2013

REAL REASONS FOR FAKE ORGASMS...

REAL REASONS FOR FAKE ORGASMS

It shouldn't take a QUANTUM MECHANIC to figure out that females FABRICATE orgasms.

 

On the other hand - WHY they would find such MIND-BLOWING extremes necessary - MIGHT!!

MAXIMUM THRUST
If ones body is literally ones VEHICLE - it's time to take a peek under the HOOD and make sure the ENGINE is WELL-OILED, running on all available CYLINDERS and, of course - that the THRUST is maximized!


It's a far greater feat to get a woman's MOTOR RUNNING than that of a man - but a satisfying COUPLING for all demands TIMING, BALANCE, and ALIGNMENT - and may even require a RECHARGEABLE BATTERY!

Here are the NUTS and BOLTS of how to urge her O-ver that FINISH LINE before she RUNS OUT OF GAS....
 
  • Pay close attention to the WARNING LIGHTS, TEMPERATURE GAUGES, and most importantly - the FLUID LEVELS...
If you just keep obliviously DRIVING and DRIVING without making sure the fluid levels are topped up - you can bet that the EMERGENCY BRAKE will be sharply and forcibly applied - causing a sudden BACK-FIRE and a dangerous build up of PRESSURE!

This is one time that you want to FLOOD the BATTERY!


  • If you can't even find the IGNITION - you shouldn't be in the DRIVER'S SEAT...
NEED BODY WORK? GET ON TRACK
 Instead, you should be studying the BEGINNERS MANUAL until you can pass, or make passes - confidently, gracefully - and with your eyes shut! It may just be a small matter of RE-ALIGNING the STEERING - which is always worth the investment!

  • Need BODY WORK? Get on TRACK..
You may not be the SLEEKEST MODEL in the RACE, but, the least you should be able to accomplish is getting to the FINISH LINE without THROWING A DISC or BLOWING A GASKET!

  • Choking on too much EXHAUST is 'EXHAUST-ING'...   
Let me say this one more time on behalf of  all WOMAN-kind - in a language that MAN-kind may understand:  We do NOT think that an abundance of GAS, FUMES, and EXHAUST is even half as adorable as you do! 
TOO MUCH EXHAUST
How is it, therefore, that the less a woman enjoys choking on her man's EXHAUST - the more 'EXHAUST-ING' he seems to become?

YAWN! It's time for a TUNE-UP  of the BORE-STROKES, boys! Stop being so IDLE,  fire up her SPARK PLUGS and make it possible for you BOTH to attain 'PEAK' EFFICIENCY!

If you have found the information above to be in any way BAFFLING, then please check your FINAL DRIVE RATIO - adjust accordingly - get rid of the SLUDGE, and have her WAVING THE CHECKERED FLAG in the CLUTCH!

Have i made myself clear as HIGH-GRADE OIL?

WAVING THE CHECKERED FLAG IN THE CLUTCH
  

 WANT MORE? I'MKAR'N IS FULL OF IT....

 PLEASE LEAVE A FOOTPRINT AND SHARE IF YOU DARE...